You already know it—your mom is not going to hook you up. She might have plans, but that “nice” girl or boy she picked, well, it’s just not going to work out. Problem is, you’re still single. So if you cannot get a “nice” girl or boy thanks to mom (or the village matchmaker), what are you going to do? Network! The name of the game, when it comes to hooking up, is meeting up with a lot of people—and it doesn’t stop with Facebook and singles bars.
MEET N' GREET
Let’s start things off lightly. You need to hone your social skills and widen your social circle. Most of the time, that’s all it takes to meet Mr./Ms. Right.
Bangkok Young Professionals
Who goes there? Workaholics.
Where? Posh restaurants and bars around town including Nest Bar and Indus.
Tips: Bring truckloads of namecards because here’s where your business connection files multiply.
Verdict: You might be able to introduce these people to your parents but do you really want to spend the rest of your life (or the night) with a suit?
Contact: www.mobyelite.com/byp
Creative Ministry
Who goes there? Artists, PRs and professionals in the media, advertising and entertainment business.
Where: In the past, they’ve held meets at the Met and Gazebo—obviously, the trend is upscale and hip.
Tips: Do not go in a suit or jacket. You’re in the creative industry; you’ve got to look the part.
Verdict: Not only do you get hooked up, but she/he has a creative job. Is this like a Hollywood romantic comedy or what?
Contact: www.infocusasia.com
Bangkok Trader
Who goes there? Older farang men and younger women. One word: expatville.
Where? Pubs, bars, any place where there’s lot of beer and English food.
Tips: You probably should go in thinking you will be suffering from a slight beer hangover tomorrow. Don’t drive.
Verdict: Hope you’ve been working on that tan.
Contact: www.bangkoktraders.com
Facebook
Who goes there? Who doesn’t? OK, compared to MySpace, you might say Facebook is the more grown-up and professional networking website.
What’s the vibe? Cruisy! It looks like a networking website but with the relationship status info plus applications that work as new age flirting tools, it really is a matchmaking site.
Tips: Adjust that privacy setting so that every time
you do something it doesn’t pop up on everyone’s homepage.
Verdict: It works and you know it.
Contact: www.facebook.com
QUICK SCOPE
Busy? Try something light like speed dating. It’s short, snappy and sweet. And if you really can’t stand the person you’re being forced to interact with, just think, you only have to put up with him/her for five short minutes!
Bangkok Matching
Who goes there: Professionals, 25 and up. A good mix of Thai and farang people looking for a fun night out. You’re guaranteed to meet others in the same boat as yourself.
What’s the vibe: Fun, fun, fun. It’s like a timed video game. You’ve got to score the most points in a given amount of time.
Tips: Ask questions that will tell you most about someone. So instead of asking, “What position do you hold in your advertising company,” ask, “What made you get into advertising in the first place?” Avoid yes or no questions.
Verdict: This thing is efficient! You’re going to meet loads of people—the rest is up to you.
Contact: www.bangkokmatching.com
YOU NEED A PRO
You’re partying every night, you’ve got 1453 friends on facebook.com, you’ve exchanged business cards with everyone in town who has one (and even handed out a few to people who didn’t) and you’re still single. Time to get professional help and some one-on-one appointments with like-minded people who have decided to get serious about hooking up.
But before we introduce you to a matchmaker, let’s just put it out there—you’re not a desperate soul and opening up to a stranger is not as bad as you think—especially when they’ve been trained to do it. You’re going to be asked about everything from your daily routine to what your past relationships were like—so get ready to spill the beans with someone who might be a stranger now, but could potentially be the first person you call later.
MeetNLunch
The Matchmaker: Nikki Assavathorn
The Process: When you sign up, you get a consultation session with Nikki, a warm and welcoming lady who is the only Thai woman to be certified as a matchmaker by the Matchmaker Institute (New York). She asks you questions about yourself, your likes, dislikes and expectations. Nikki meets all her clients herself so when you go in, tell yourself you’re out there having a one-on-one bonding session with a close friend (it’s not going to be too hard to do that). Once you’re sorted, MeetNLunch will dish out possible candidates for six dates. For the less picky, it takes between 3-5 days to find a suitable match, for the ones that have long lists of requirements—the process might take a little longer. Post date, you’ll sit with Nikki to talk about what was good and what was bad. After the evaluation, they pick your next one.
The Deal: B9,800 (6 dates), B12,500 (12 dates).
Verdict: You’re guaranteed some personal attention and a good mix and match of Thai and farang professionals.
Contact: www.meetnlunch.com
It’s Just Lunch
The Matchmaker: Anisa Hassan
The Process: Hassan’s service has been in the business for over 17 years and has offices worldwide with branches from Singapore to New York. Because it’s an international brand, you’re probably not going to be talking to Anisa herself, but trusted with a senior consultant from the Singapore office who will conduct the interview process. Once they’ve picked your match, your first name is revealed to the person but nothing else. They set up the date at a restaurant and your job is to show up (on time) and have a good time. If you’re made to shift locales for work, your membership can be transferred to a different city.
The Deal: B25,000, one-year membership, 12 introductions.Verdict: It’s worldwide, which suggests international-standard professionalism. Plus! You get to get cozy with our neighbors from Singapore!
Contact: www.itsjustlunchbangkok.com
Bangkok Matching
The Matchmaker: Kulchulee “Bee” Subsinudom
The Process: Singles are invited to monthly networking events (see +stuff page 27) where friendly and bubbly Khun Bee is always present—ready to introduce you to so-and-so. For one-on-one meets, all members are subjected to an interview with Khun Bee and a background check before going on dates set up by the service. Bangkok Matching also sets up gay and lesbian couples. Subscriptions are valid for one year.
The Deal: B6,000 (introduction to 3 people), B11,000 (7 people), B15,000 (10 people). Event fees are not included.
Verdict: If do you both the events as well as the one-on-one dates, you are getting in touch with a whole lot of people. And if you don’t find a special someone, you’ll still bump up your standings to a social butterfly.
Contact: www.bangkokmatching.com
We Match
The Matchmaker: Pitcha “Maew” Prakaylerdluk
The Process: Fill out an online application, get interviewed and leave it to them to find you an individual from Bangkok’s upper-crust. They offer everything from a personal shopper to someone to accompany you on your date! Don’t worry, they’re not going to sit there and watch you eat: they’ll bring you to your location, do the introductions and hit the exit before you guys take your seat. If you feel like you’ve lost touch with the dating game, choose to be briefed on a few pointers before taking the plunge (see Ace the First Impression page 10).
The Deal: Pick from two one-year packages: B10,000 (3 dates) or B20,000 (8 dates).
Verdict: You might get lucky—Khun Pitcha’s got a wedding planning studio. If you get to a point where you require that service, you won’t have to look very far.
Contact: www.wematch.co.th
Who Is Match
The Matchmaker: Chanunchida “Whan” Pathomkulmai
The Process: At Who Is Match, you are given the opportunity to look over as many profiles as you want before you make your decision. The screening process includes a personality test and an interview with a consultant—you pick male or female—Khun Whan or Khun Bob—who will present you with a few selected candidate-written profiles (straight from the horses mouth). If you’re lucky, you’ll end up picking someone who doesn’t really mind dishing out more information. You might even get a phone conversation before your actual date.
The Deal: Pick from two packages B7,000 (2 dates), B10,000
(4 dates)—no time limit.
Verdict: You’ve got to love the professional purebred locals—75:25 local-foreigner ratio.
Contact: www.whoismatch.com
Search the Seas
You’re done with the nightlife scene, you hate big crowds, and you’re kind of at a stage where you just want to go about your daily life and casually “run into” someone. Here’s where you can do just that.
Shoe Rugs
Mobile shopping rugs are packed with office-going ladies after 5:30pm. Check out the entrance of the Silom Center parking lot on Silom Road. If you’re lucky, your shoulders might just become support for her to comfortably try on her heels.
Street-side DVD Shops
Like the shoe rugs, bootleg DVD stalls are great places to meet the movie-lovin’-over-worked-young-man. When your eye catches what movie he’s going for, take the plunge and grab the same film. “You love Transformers, too!” There’s a conversation waiting to be started.
Mac Store
Who? Creative dudes and dudettes who care more about their Mac accessories rather than getting their mack on! Where? Try the Emporium (Sukhumvit Soi 24). Amazing what bonding over Leopard and iPhone speakers can do to kickstart a relationship.
Villa Supermarkets
Take a little trip to the one at Sukhumvit Soi 33, fill that cart with things you want to be seen with and get noticed! Truffles and Champagne perhaps? (You can always pull an emergency exit and come back for the more-affordable-portobello and prosecco variety later).
J-Avenue
A Young(er), pretty, rich and calorie conscious crowd can be found lingering around the Au Bon Pain here with their Chicken Caesar Salad and whole-wheat sandwich.
True Cafe
Siam Paragon’s True Café—truly a wondrous place for someone who’s got nothing better to do on a Sunday afternoon. When you’re sick of working on your living room couch with your boring ol’ coffee mug in hand, head on over there for some flavor—both coffee and cuties. Don’t forget your iPhone.
Driving Range
Hit the Tee Golf driving range (Sukhumvit Soi 40) where hittin’ a few balls around can get you miles! The key is to show that you’re having trouble with your form. With some serious eye contact and a few smiles, you might just land yourself a personal golf teacher.
Cooking Class
Most of the time, the men and women here are married and are only there because their spouse has threatened to throw them out unless they cook up a romantic meal or two. However, on a good day, you’ll find a few bachelors and bachelorettes who just have the flair for cooking! Talk about smokin’ hot!
Dance Class
Hit the Salsa Hacha Dance Studio and Café (Silom Soi 6) where you will find both men and women who choose to make a statement by strutting their stuff. Forget salsa—it’s bachata time! Think Antonia Banderas and the hot (bitchy chick) in Take the Lead. Ai Caramba!
Kinokuniya Isetan
Funky Japanese boys and girls who hide behind big books just to take quick sneak peaks at the surrounding scene. If you’re clever, you’ll pick the right section, run your fingers along the top edge of the books and meet them halfway! Ah! The good ol’ days of romancing in the library.
Ace the First Impression
Five female dating experts share their secrets on acing that crucial first date.
Looks Matter
Dress according to the venue, the time of day and your comfort level. Do not douse yourself in cologne or perfume or adorn yourself in anything too revealing or, as us commoners would call it, skanky. “Ladies, a nice dress and stilettos always work like a charm! For men—a nice crisp shirt and crease-free pants and good shiny shoes. Those are the basics,” says Anisa Hassan from It’s Just Lunch.
Confidence
Ah! The big “C” word. Careful, though, you don’t want to have the four-letter “O” word attached to it which can almost guarantee your placement within the “cocky and self absorbed” category. “Make lots of eye contact and hold their gaze. This shows that you are not intimidated and plus, it’s more attractive to the other person,” says Chanunchida Pathomkulmai from Who is Match.
Drop the Expectations
“Keep an open mind and don’t expect sparks to fly immediately. Set your expectations right so you can be pleasantly surprised,” says Anisa.
Yap Yap
Try to engage in light and casual—but at the same time intelligent and interesting—topics of conversation. “If you’re concerned, be sure to read a newspaper or watch a news program that day so you’re up on world events,” says MeetNLunch’s Nikki Assavathorn. There seems to be one big consensus among our experts—refrain from talking about your exes!
Smile
Look, even if you don’t have the whitest teeth, smiling can never derail a smooth running first date. “Be happy,” says Bangkok Matching’s Kulchulee Subsinudom, “people can sense and feel the happiness from you, believe me!”
Men: Pull a George Clooney
“Ladies, if the man offers to pay, offer a sincere thank you,” says Anisa. Chivalry: it still exists and —almost always—the woman will be floored.
Time Is Money, Baby!
Being on time can be a big determinant of your character. So don’t just flash the Cartier—use it! As Nikki would say, “There’s no greater sign of disrespect than being late for your first date. Get directions!”
Relax
“Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. It’s all about having a good and positive attitude about entering the dating scene again. If you end up meeting someone then it’s great! But if you don’t, you just have to keep going out—give yourself a chance to meet more people. The biggest secret is to be happy with yourself,” says Kulchulee.
Lookin’ Good
Whoever’s been spreading the rumor that looks don’t matter is a straight up liar. So, whether you like it or not, let the beautification begin because that’s one sure fire way of getting you back in business.
Mac Workshop
You’re not just going to have your face touched up in a few minutes; you are in fact, learning how to do it! Buy your vouchers and join the experts for a session on everything from skin care tips and to application techniques. Vouchers are product-redeemable. B3,000/3 hours. 11am-2pm or 4pm-7pm. Jun 26-29, 6/F, Central Chidlom. Jul 17-20, 3/F, Central Pinklao. Jul 24-27, Emporium Suites.
Lifestyle Consultants
It’s free! You get to meet two lifestyle consultants: Ornapa Krisadee and Adisak Rojsiriphan. Ornapa, otherwise known as Maa, deals with wellness—skin, body and facial treatments, plus, for the ladies, huge tips on makeup techniques. Adisak, otherwise known as Leng, deals more with fashion and style. He’ll make sure you’re properly advised on how to attain the entire look. Call 02-656-1177 to arrange an appointment. Mon-Sun, 10am-8pm. At Gaysorn Shopping Center.
Personal Shoppers
Fashion is not everyone’s cup of tea. Hire yourself a personal stylist and have him/her pick out what’s best for you, your personality and your body type. We like clothes that flatter, not falter. Contact Central Chidlom (02-793-7777) or Emporium (02-269-1000). For something a little more hi-so, fill out an application form and fax it over to five stylists at the Siam Paragon Shopping Complex. Call The Platinum Club at 02-610-8080 to arrange an appointment.
