Dating in the 21st century—here’s how you do it. By Sonia Boonchanasukit, illustration by Temsiri Pothipattananont

You already know it—your mom is not going to hook you up. She might have plans, but that “nice” girl or boy she picked, well, it’s just not going to work out. Problem is, you’re still single.

So if you cannot get a “nice” girl or boy thanks to mom (or the village matchmaker), what are you going to do? Network! The name of the game, when it comes to hooking up, is meeting up with a lot of people—and it doesn’t stop with Facebook and singles bars.

Meet n’ Greet

Let’s start things off lightly. You need to hone your social skills and widen your social circle. Most of the time, that’s all it takes to meet Mr./Ms. Right.

Bangkok Young Professionals

Who goes there? Workaholics.
Where? Posh restaurants and bars around town including Nest Bar and Indus.
Tips: Bring truckloads of namecards because here’s where your business connection files multiply.
Verdict: You might be able to introduce these people to your parents but do you really want to spend the rest of your life (or the night) with a suit?
Contact: www.mobyelite.com/byp

Creative Ministry

Who goes there? Artists, PRs and professionals in the media, advertising and entertainment business.
Where: In the past, they’ve held meets at the Met and Gazebo—obviously, the trend is upscale and hip.
Tips: Do not go in a suit or jacket. You’re in the creative industry; you’ve got to look the part.
Verdict: Not only do you get hooked up, but she/he has a creative job. Is this like a Hollywood romantic comedy or what?
Contact: www.infocusasia.com

Bangkok Trader

Who goes there? Older farang men and younger women. One word: expatville.
Where? Pubs, bars, any place where there’s lot of beer and English food.
Tips: You probably should go in thinking you will be suffering from a slight beer hangover tomorrow. Don’t drive.
Verdict: Hope you’ve been working on that tan.
Contact: www.bangkoktraders.com

Facebook

Who goes there? Who doesn’t? OK, compared to MySpace, you might say Facebook is the more grown-up and professional networking website.
What’s the vibe? Cruisy! It looks like a networking website but with the relationship status info plus applications that work as new age flirting tools, it really is a matchmaking site.
Tips: Adjust that privacy setting so that every time
you do something it doesn’t pop up on everyone’s homepage.
Verdict: It works and you know it.
Contact: www.facebook.com

Quick Scope

Busy? Try something light like speed dating. It’s short, snappy and sweet. And if you really can’t stand the person you’re being forced to interact with, just think, you only have to put up with him/her for five short minutes!

Bangkok Matching

Who goes there? Professionals, 25 and up. A good mix of Thai and farang people looking for a fun night out. You’re guaranteed to meet others in the same boat as yourself.
What’s the vibe? Fun, fun, fun. It’s like a timed video game. You’ve got to score the most points in a given amount of time.
Tips: Ask questions that will tell you most about someone. So instead of asking, “What position do you hold in your advertising company,” ask, “What made you get into advertising in the first place?” Avoid yes or no questions.
Verdict: This thing is efficient! You’re going to meet loads of people—the rest is up to you.
Contact: www.bangkokmatching.com

You Need a Pro

You’re partying every night, you’ve got 1453 friends on facebook.com, you’ve exchanged business cards with everyone in town who has one (and even handed out a few to people who didn’t) and you’re still single. Time to get professional help and some one-on-one appointments with like-minded people who have decided to get serious about hooking up.

But before we introduce you to a matchmaker, let’s just put it out there—you’re not a desperate soul and opening up to a stranger is not as bad as you think—especially when they’ve been trained to do it. You’re going to be asked about everything from your daily routine to what your past relationships were like—so get ready to spill the beans with someone who might be a stranger now, but could potentially be the first person you call later.

MeetNLunch

The Matchmaker: Nikki Assavathorn

The Process: When you sign up, you get a consultation session with Nikki, a warm and welcoming lady who is the only Thai woman to be certified as a matchmaker by the Matchmaker Institute (New York). She asks you questions about yourself, your likes, dislikes and expectations. Nikki meets all her clients herself so when you go in, tell yourself you’re out there having a one-on-one bonding session with a close friend (it’s not going to be too hard to do that). Once you’re sorted, MeetNLunch will dish out possible candidates for six dates. For the less picky, it takes between 3-5 days to find a suitable match, for the ones that have long lists of requirements—the process might take a little longer. Post date, you’ll sit with Nikki to talk about what was good and what was bad. After the evaluation, they pick your next one.
The Deal: B9,800 (6 dates), B12,500 (12 dates).
Verdict: You’re guaranteed some personal attention and a good mix and match of Thai and farang professionals.
Contact: www.meetnlunch.com

It’s Just Lunch

The Matchmaker: Anisa Hassan

The Process: Hassan’s service has been in the business for over 17 years and has offices worldwide with branches from Singapore to New York. Because it’s an international brand, you’re probably not going to be talking to Anisa herself, but trusted with a senior consultant from the Singapore office who will conduct the interview process. Once they’ve picked your match, your first name is revealed to the person but nothing else. They set up the date at a restaurant and your job is to show up (on time) and have a good time. If you’re made to shift locales for work, your membership can be transferred to a different city.
The Deal: B25,000, one-year membership, 12 introductions.
Verdict: It’s worldwide, which suggests international-standard  professionalism. Plus! You get to get cozy with our neighbors from Singapore!
Contact: www.itsjustlunchbangkok.com

Bangkok Matching

The Matchmaker: Kulchulee “Bee” Subsinudom

The Process: Singles are invited to monthly networking events (see +stuff page 27) where friendly and bubbly Khun Bee is always present—ready to introduce you to so-and-so. For one-on-one meets, all members are subjected to an interview with Khun Bee and a background check before going on dates set up by the service. Bangkok Matching also sets up gay and lesbian couples. Subscriptions are valid for one year.
The Deal: B6,000 (introduction to 3 people), B11,000 (7 people), B15,000 (10 people). Event fees are not included.
Verdict: If do you both the events as well as the one-on-one dates, you are getting in touch with a whole lot of people. And if you don’t find a special someone, you’ll still bump up your standings to a social butterfly.
Contact: www.bangkokmatching.com

We Match

The Matchmaker: Pitcha “Maew” Prakaylerdluk

The Process: Fill out an online application, get interviewed and leave it to them to find you an individual from Bangkok’s upper-crust. They offer everything from a personal shopper to someone to accompany you on your date! Don’t worry, they’re not going to sit there and watch you eat: they’ll bring you to your location, do the introductions and hit the exit before you guys take your seat. If you feel like you’ve lost touch with the dating game, choose to be briefed on a few pointers before taking the plunge (see Ace the First Impression page 10).
The Deal: Pick from two one-year packages: B10,000 (3 dates) or B20,000 (8 dates).
Verdict: You might get lucky—Khun Pitcha’s got a wedding planning studio. If you get to a point where you require that service, you won’t have to look very far.
Contact: www.wematch.co.th

Who Is Match

The Matchmaker: Chanunchida “Whan” Pathomkulmai
The Process: At Who Is Match, you are given the opportunity to look over as many profiles as you want before you make your decision. The screening process includes a personality test and an interview with a consultant—you pick male or female—Khun Whan or Khun Bob—who will present you with a few selected candidate-written profiles (straight from the horses mouth). If you’re lucky, you’ll end up picking someone who doesn’t really mind dishing out more information. You might even get a phone conversation before your actual date.
The Deal: Pick from two packages B7,000 (2 dates), B10,000 (4 dates)—no time limit.
Verdict: You’ve got to love the professional purebred locals—75:25 local-foreigner ratio.
Contact: www.whoismatch.com