Celebrate the Olympics by recreating the lofty ideal of fair play without the hassle of months of training. All you need is some friends and these Olympic inspired games. By Nick Measures, illustrations by Nop Tangtrongsakdi

Athletics

The real deal: From the Blue Riband 100m to the epic Marathon, track events are the highlight of the Games.
Equipment needed: Stopwatch, matchbox.
Rules: Depending on space this can be an individual timed event or a straight out race. An empty matchbox is placed at the beginning of the 10m track. Olympians line up at the start, with hands on the floor, nose on the matchbox on the floor. The aim is to be the first to use their snout to push their matchbox across the finish line. Contestants are disqualified if they touch the box with anything other than their nose.

Fencing

The real deal: Swashbuckling rivals cut and thrust in an attempt to hit each other on the chest or head.
Equipment needed: White t-shirts, bread sticks, tomato sauce, sieve (optional head protection).
Rules: Each contestant dons a cheap white t-shirt and selects a bread stick. Dip the thrusting end of the stick into the sauce and prepare for combat. The person who manages to mark their opponent’s shirt three times is deemed the winner. 

Discus

The real deal: Lots of spinning as athletes try to hurl a disc-shaped object as far as possible.
Equipment needed: Paper plates, tape measure.
Rules: Mark a circle in the ground around 2.5 meters in diameter with a clear space in front of the circle. This is where contestants must throw the plate. Olympians must step into the circle and spin at least three times before throwing the paper plate out of the front of the circle. If they leave the circle before the plate lands it’s a foul. Each athlete gets three throws, the longest throw wins.

Shooting

The real deal: People with big guns firing at tiny targets.
Equipment needed: Empty cans, a cheap plastic gun that fires plastic bullets (raid your little cousin’s toy box).
Rules: Contestants take turns to fire at ten empty cans at the end of a firing range (other side of the room) with a cheap toy gun (no real guns allowed). Each athlete has 10 shots only, with no practice shots permitted. The highest number of cans hit wins. In the event of a draw, those tied for first should enter a sudden death shoot out, the first to miss loses.

Weightlifting

The real deal: Lots of muscled men (and women) in very skimpy lycra outfits trying to lift heavy things over their head.
Equipment needed: Flat wall.
Rules: All contestants line up against a bare wall with their backs against it. They must then walk their feet out from the wall while bending their knees and waist so that they are in a sitting position with their back still flat against the wall, thighs parallel to the floor, and hands on thighs. The last one to remain in this position without lifting a foot or touching the wall or floor with another body part is crowned the heavyweight winner.

Javelin

The real deal: Hurling a long pointy spear as far as possible.
Equipment needed: Plastic straws, tape measure.
Rules: Now javelins are actually quite dangerous, so to insure there are no accidents this event utilizes the less threatening (and more affordable) plastic straw. Contestants select their straw and attempt to throw it as far as they can from behind a clearly marked line. Each contestant gets four throws, longest throw wins. Tampering with straws to improve aerodynamics results in instant disqualification.