Dear Mr. KIA: I wanna be a rock star but there’s no way I’m going to humiliate myself by joining AF. Sure, they get famous fast, but only because they’re exposing their lives on TV, definitely not because of their talent. My band and I want to be known for our music, not for some phony reason. We’re pretty good at what we do but I still think we need a little bit of help before we start cranking out a demo. I was wondering if there are any classes out there that are geared towards training you to become a kick-ass rock band? Thanks Mr. KIA and you’ll be the first to get a backstage pass to our sell-out concert—Don’t Mock My Rock.

Dear DMMR: Yes, those AF kids are a joke. They can’t sing, they can’t dance and those who buy their albums or go to their concerts need serious help. I’m so glad there are still kids like you out there—people who believe in music for art’s sake, even if it’s very, very loud music. Let me introduce you to some of the places that are trying to nurture the high quality rock stars we deserve. Rock on—and you better make good on that backstage pass!

Private Studio is a music studio run by the talented vocalist Gob Saovanit. Her studio focuses on voice training lessons. Remember, Axl Rose was a choirboy before he became Guns n’Roses’ front man.

MIFA Artist Academy has just started a six-month rock star program called X-Theme Instruments. Teachers include big name artists such as Blackhead, Paradox and Potato. Just meeting these guys makes the program worth it! You’ll work on your musical skills and also how to perform live or produce. Just one thing, you must pass an audition to attend.

Sound About Music Performance and Production School Their list of classes is as ridiculously long as their name. Aside from musical instrument classes (guitar, bass, piano, and drums), they also offer courses in music production, from songwriting to sound engineering. The school is equipped with professional-level studio equipment. This is as close as it gets to the real thing!